Why Did I Fake an Asthma Attack? The Childhood Lie That Changed My Life –

Monday Morning Reflections: A Cloudy Start and Childhood Memories

It’s Monday morning. It’s cloudy outside. It’s not even 7 AM, and I’m driving on the expressway back home.

Normally, I would be rushing to make my 7:30 AM Zoom client, but I don’t have that client today.

It’s nearing the end of July, and August is approaching.

When I was a kid, I used to hate this time of the year—but love it just as well.

I hated walking into the store and seeing back-to-school supplies on special right now.

It was the inevitable fact that school was right around the corner.

Now back in my day—sound like an old man—but back in my day, school normally started anywhere between August 20 or August 25, somewhere around there.

I would get a sense of depression thinking about going back to school.

It wasn’t that I was bad at school—or, now that’s subjective.

When I mean bad, like I couldn’t understand the information, or I felt intimidated or bullied or anything like that.

Nah

I just wanted to play video games at home all day .

That’s honestly what it was.

 

The Asthma Attack That Wasn’t

I never refused to go to school—except maybe one time—when I intentionally faked an asthma attack back in the third grade.

Now, I never knew anything about asthma seriously, but I remember seeing some of my classmates get to leave school because of their asthma attack.

So one day, I decided to fake an asthma attack.

We were walking up the hall, and I just remembered the hallway floors were just very shiny. 

As we were lining up, I decided, “Let me try this asthma attack thing. Let me try that.”

So I began to breathe in very frantically, and the teacher was like, “What’s wrong?”

I said, “I think I’m having an asthma attack.”

Now, I was not on paper to have an inhaler or medical records to show I had asthma at the time.

So I went down to the principal’s office, until my mom came to pick me up, or my uncle.

Somebody in my family came to pick me up because my mom was at work, so I pretty much understand that she wasn’t able to come.

 

The Unexpected Doctor Visit and Harsh Truth

Now that I’m home, I could play my video games all day and the next because I knew I wouldn’t be going back to school for a few days!

Far as playing video games for the next few days, that necessarily wasn’t the case. 

The next day, I went to the doctor, which I didn’t expect.

I didn’t expect to go to the doctor from an asthma attack that was faked.

I just wanted to play Castlevania on Nintendo.

I couldn’t get past a certain part, and it was just frustrating.

 

The Doctor Reveals a Bigger Truth—Weight Awareness Begins

Now I’m at this doctor’s appointment confused

They began to let me know that I needed to change my diet.

The Doc said “You need to eat some fruit.”

I responded, “What’s a diet? What’s that?”

His response to my mom,

“If he’s suffering from an asthma attack, he’s just heavily breathing. I don’t see any signs of asthma attack or anything like that, nor signs he’s going to have asthma. But if he’s just out of breath? He’s too fat. He’s too big.”

And I was like, “Huh?”

That was the first time I realized I had a weight problem.

It was very eye-opening.

I never knew I was a big kid. I never knew I was the fat kid like that—until the doctor said it.

 

Shame, Awareness, and a Shift in Consciousness

You know, when kids say things, it can come off as mean and, “Oh, okay, they don’t know what they’re talking about. They’re just hating.”

But no—the doctor said it.

I was told by a doctor that I was overweight.

I wasn’t hurt by the doctor. I wasn’t. My feelings weren’t hurt. It was just like, “My plan failed!”

What I thought was a quick getaway from being in school led me to the path of what I’m on right now to where I am talking to you reading this.

I began to become conscious of my appearance. I began to have consciousness of my weight, health and everything surrounding it.

When these back-to-school signs pop up, from year after year since that moment, I just think about the upcoming school year—how I just didn’t want to be there.  I just wanted to play video games all day.  

The reality is, when you begin to educate, when you dedicate time to educate yourself one way or another, you will find a lesson that you didn’t even think you were going to find.

That wasn’t the intent. But things changed. Just like time. Just like the seasons.

 

Value of Changing Seasons

One of the reasons why I love the end of July because it’s my brother’s birthday—and my older cousin’s birthday—my cousin Shad, who passed.

He was like a brother to me.

Words cannot explain how much I miss him. 

I remember when he was here, we always had a good time.

My biological, older brother,  always had summer birthday parties (or so I thought when I was younger).

It seemed like he had friends that were able to celebrate his birthday with him in the summer.

I’m a December baby, so I didn’t necessarily get the pool parties you know, things like that. 

As I’ve gotten older, I’ve been learning to appreciate the different seasons

Even if it’s the season that I don’t necessarily care for that’s upcoming, because I’m going to have to learn something.

 

Learning to Endure and Build Strength

Far as the lesson that will be taught and learned, I may not necessarily know what that is.

I may set my goals out for it to be something that I want to learn, but within that, something else pops out in regards to what it is to be learned—or what is to be gained in this lesson.

That’s the beauty of life

When seasons are getting ready to change, and when seasons change,

you have to be prepared for all lessons that are learned.

That’s what I’m learning right now in this season of change. 

I have to learn how to be better.

I have to learn how to be stronger.

I have to learn how to be wiser—praying for wisdom, praying for discernment, and understanding of what this life entails and how to navigate in it.

The lessons that can be learned—is about strength.

It’s about resilience.

I’m learning lessons on who I am today in 2025.

That person has become more calmer, more aware.

 

The Role of Exercise in Managing Anxiety and Staying Grounded

There are times where I’m not calm.

The times when I’m not calm, can possibly cause harm to myself and or others.

So what is the lesson learned? It’s to calm down.

My anxiousness, my uncertainty won’t bring harm/ hurt to others. A

A lot of times I’m anxious because I may not know what to do.

I’m wound up. I just haven’t… worked out.

What I found out is—working out helps alleviate the stresses and the woes of life.

Part of my morning routine I’m getting back into my morning cardio bike ride.

30 minutes used to be challenging, just from a couple weeks ago.

I learned how to endure it for 30 minutes because I wanted 30 minutes.

That was my goal.

What I learned going from 20 minutes to 30 minutes is that I don’t have to ride the bike continuously for 30 minutes straight.

I can ride for 20, take a one-minute rest, and get back on the bike for the last 10 minutes.

There are times when sitting on that seat hurts for a while, or it’s uncomfortable.

I’ve learned how to endure the uncomfortableness of what it takes to get stronger.

Hence the hashtag, mantra moniker… #MoreWeight

Translation

To endure, is to become stronger.

 

Truth, Routine, and the Real Truth

The only way that I can continue to ride this bike for 30 minutes, is to endure some uncomfortableness but

At the end of the 30 minutes, I feel so relieved. I completed it.

Then the next day, I do the same thing again. But this time, I don’t need the one-minute break to split up between the 20 and the 10.

“I can endure. I’m strong enough to endure this”

That’s what I chant every day—to relieve my anxiety, my worry.

I’m older now.

When my mom got the call that I was having an asthma attack, she probably panicked.

I would too if I had a child and he said, “I’m sick. I’m having an asthma attack.”

The lesson learned is that… I need to tell the truth.